Thursday, 22 January 2015

The Curious Case of the Great Indian Litterbug

The Great Indian Litterbug,
he amuses me much.
His curious case befuddles me too,
the country is in his clutch!

Ah, that was a pathetic rhyme I know, but I guess not as bad as the state of our streets and roads oozing with the love constantly being left behind by the Indian Litterbug. Ah, before you wonder who this seemingly larger-than-life sounding gentleman is and try to put two and two together, let me do the honours - here's a video introducing him.

So you see, here he is, THE OMNIPRESENT, OMNIPOTENT - the Great Indian Litterbug, forever armed with powerful gears to litter the road. Prime Minister Narendra Modi's Swacch Bharat Abhiyaan be damned, he says, for no abhiyaan or mission can come in his way to keep our oh-so great country littered and teeming with filth.

But despite his myriad ways to keep his surroundings God-awful, the Great Indian Litterbug is beyond my comprehension. For the life of me, I fail to understand this man and how his mind works and what keeps him going!  He uses the roads as his spittoon,  the pavements and the roadside walls as his urinal, and the streets at large as his garbage bin! Sigh. No pleadings, no threats, no sarcasm works on him. No mocking either - you write on a wall

Gadhe ke poot,
Yahaan mat moot

but no, he has to moot (pee :D) right on that wall, right under those words berating him. He's an idiot, assh*le aright, for all he cares. When a man has to go, a man has to go, you see. When the nature calls, the call must be answered right away, that's his logic and you dare not defy that. Cleanliness is next to Godliness bullshit be damned too, such preachings are for the books, and of course the phoren countries, he argues, and not for the desis like us. Duh, sir.

Do get to know more about the Great Indian Litterbug and his many shenanigans, you can check out this quirky website - The Great Indian - but readers, I plead you, yes I plead you, do not, I repeat do not, in any way be influenced by the Great Indian Litterbug's reckless abandon. Do not be taken in by his filthy ways. For you see , he is 'like that only' - and you are not him, and he is not you. (I assume, I hope!) You know better, no? On that note, let's all come together to decipher the curious case of the Great Indian Litterbug, and pledge to be  part of our Prime Minister's Swacch Bharat Abhiyaan, for his clarion call for cleanliness is addressed to every single one of us.  

This post is a part of the Great Indian Litterbug campaign by The Times of India, in association with Indiblogger.

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